What Do You Want Your Art to Look Like?

Who knew that taking a depth year would mean in-depth time at home, in-depth conversations about health and viruses, in-depth time alone?

The first week of February I went to NYC for a wholesale gift show.  I also viewed art at The Met and MOMA.  Sadly I got the flu while there, so at home I spent the rest of the month inside. . . healing, pondering my life, saying goodbye to an old friendship that no longer suits.  It was quiet and contemplative.

I got so used to staying in, that when Massachusetts issued a stay-at-home order in March, it wasn't a big change to my life, or so I thought.  What didn't register were the weekly things I just did as a matter of course:  Sunday lunch at a local Mexican restaurant with my husband after church -- they may not know our names but they know our favorite table and drinks order;  lunch at the local sandwich place where we do know each others names, where they're fine that I bring my own to-go cup; occasional trips to Michael's to be inspired.   I miss those people & interactions.

With all this time at home, and the freedom from deadlines or things I need to do, I decided to tackle the year-long online art workshop I'd signed up for.  I recently got the prompt for week 12 and since I was only half done with week 1, I thought I'd jump back in.  I sort of liked what I'd done before, but when I followed the rest of the instructions I absolutely hated my overall piece.  The more I tried to fix it the worse it got.  Finally I tore the pages out, walked into the room where my husband was selling on eBay and announced I was having an existential crisis.  I can be so dramatic at times!

Bits of the page I did like

My husband was great.  He closed the lid of his laptop and said, "I assume you want my thoughts on this?"  I did.   He asked me if I was taking the course because the teachers & students were all so enthusiastic and it would be fun to be part of the group?  And yes, I replied sheepishly, that was a strong reason.

And then he asked "Do you know what you want your art to look like?"

I'm not sure anyone has ever asked me that question.  And I was ready.  I do know what kind of art I want to make.  I know what I want my art to look like.  I know I can take inspiration from others, but in the end I want my art to look like mine.

I felt so free with that realization, took the ideas I liked out of what I'd done, and made something completely different.

stencils, paint, stamps, embossing powder, ink & collage

close up

This morning as I sat at my work table I wanted to write about my experience.  It felt like a new step in my artist's life, it deserved a journal with nothing from the past in it.  So I went upstairs to find something to write in, found a book with blank lined pages, then proceeded to decorate the first pages.  While I was waiting for the glitter glue to dry, I wrote this post (and may I say I have way too many bottles of Stickles). 

Stencil, gel prints, glitter glue

The start of a new journal of art musings